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When you think of China, what image immediately comes to mind? No, not dishes. Okay, yes, Chairman Mao, communism, environmental atrocities and the like, but think again…
That’s right, pandas!
Now, when someone tells you that if you go to China you’ve got to see a panda they don’t mean that you are apt to see one or anything like that. There are a lot of things that are very common in China (bullet trains, chopsticks, temples, people) but pandas aren’t one of them. As a matter of fact, pandas would be precisely 2,239 or those things (at last count anyway, which appears to have occurred in 2013), 350 of which are in captivity.
So, despite being the veritable symbol of China, if you want to see one you really have to seek them out.
And on October 29th, 2017 I did.
I was in Guangzhou, staying in a pretty nice and very affordable hotel on Shamian Island, and having already fully explored my area I had a day to fill. I knew from my fleeting amount of research that Guangzhou was home to one of the country’s most popular (and expensive) zoos, and was pretty much the place to see not only pandas but also their lesser-known non-cousins, the red panda (also unfortunately and in my opinion incorrectly referred to as the “lesser panda”).
(The red panda isn’t a panda at all; it’s in its own family. Currently numbering less than 10,000, the red panda is closely related to raccoons and skunks, is about the size of a large housecat, and is the second-most adorable thing to come out of Tibet, next to the Dalai Lama.)
I hopped on the uber-efficient local subway system and found the zoo in no time. I was very, very surprised to discover that a) the price of admission was a tiny fraction of what I was expecting, b) there were no pandas at the zoo at all, and ultimately c) that I was at the wrong zoo. I discovered these things in a gradual, orderly fashion over the course of about an hour or so, though to be fair I spent about half that time swooning over the pair of red pandas that I discovered along the way.
My goodness, red pandas are just so blatantly cute. It’s like they were designed specifically to appeal to humans*, which is probably why they are endangered and in zoos. Yes, I felt shame for partaking in this ever-so-human inhumanity, but I eased my conscience a little by angrily calling out the first hundred or so people I saw throwing cotton candy and caramel corn at the two little fellows despite the large, unmissable sign advising not to do so.
Frankly, it was the horribleness of the zoo and it’s patrons that allowed me to pull myself away from the ever-attractive red pandas, but I did, heading straight out the gate and back to the train. A little more research dumped me at the Chimelong Safari Park, where a hefty fee gained me entrance to the correct zoo: a near-utopian animal sanctuary that easily rivalled Disney’s Animal Kingdom in the presentation and (perceived, at least) preservation of its collection of fauna.
I lingered at the vast aquariums marvelling at the agility of diving ducks, I flew above the safari plains in a private gondola gaping at herds of elephants and giraffe below, strolled past huge open-air habitats of tigers big and small, before finally coming to the pandas.
Allow me to say: it looked to me like the pandas could not have been much happier, save for having their freedom of course. They were in large cageless enclosures which weren’t enclosed at all. They had lots of room, lots of company, lots of food (aka: bamboo), and they were encouraged to exercise. I’m not saying it was perfect, but I can’t think of any zoo situation I’ve ever seen that appeared so conscientious to its charges.
I’m not even suggesting that the Chinese were being overtly kind or anything, but I am suggesting that they were being at least practical. Pandas are big money, and keeping pandas costs five times more than the price of housing the next most expensive animal (elephants), so it’s clearly in the nation’s best interests to take care of their pandas. Hopefully that’s why the first zoo no longer had any.
Chimelong had a total of thirteen pandas, including the only known set of triplets ever born (who are still together, of course), and they were enthralling. There were spots where I could literally stand eight feet from a panda with nothing but air between us. Man, they can eat! And the power of their jaws shocked me. A panda’s jaws can tear through bamboo like I was munching on celery (I assume; I’ve never actually eaten a celery stalk). I spent hours – literally hours, like almost all day – looking at pandas. I simply couldn’t get enough of them.
I suppose for all my pleas and justifications, when you really get down to it I’m really just part of the problem. And I’ll admit it: if I’m ever back in Guangzhou I’d probably head straight back to Chimelong Safari Park.
Though I think I have enough humanity in me to give the red panda place a pass.
*Go ahead, google one and tell me I’m wrong.
Todd Man Out 