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I had seen a thousand posters for it over the previous month or so: The Concert Of A Lifetime with Sri Chinmoy. Every telephone pole in the city had at least two large posters taped or stapled up (in violation of both local postering rules and standard postering etiquette), the posters were in shop windows and on placards all around the city. This Sri Chinmoy guy (1931-2007) was obviously running some sort of religious cult or something, and judging by his ability to organize such a massive and/or extremely dedicated street-team to advertise a free concert at a place as big and prestigious as the Corel Centre, he was obviously pretty good at it.
Hopefully not too good, because I decided to go check it out, and I wanted to come home again sound of mind. I had a cat to feed, and a life to not dedicate to some freaky dude with a galaxy twirling around his head.
Could it be that when I arrived at the Corel Centre on November 20th, 1999 the parking was actually free? I can’t remember for sure, but if it was I would have to watch my step – only a very, very powerful being could waive the outrageous fees the Senator’s charge for parking in a farmer’s field in Kanata.
Inside, the mood was a mix between festive and reverential with a strong dose of cult-like anticipation. The seats were not assigned, I took a spot in the lower bowl. The entire front section of the floor was flanked by hundreds, perhaps thousands of Chinmoy’s adherents, identifiable by their matching white gowns and beaming, serene half-smiles.
There was a proper professional stage set up and soon Sri Chinmoy and his entourage came out. I forget if there was thunderous or even polite applause, silence or maybe the snapping of many fingers when the featured artist took his place at the piano sitting midstage, but if there was any sound coming from the audience he soon put it to rest.
Closing his eyes, Sri Chinmoy raised his hands above his head and paused, frozen in a bardo of time. Then he brought his hands down and hit the piano as a child might, suddenly and without a shred of musicality. His head tilted back, Chinmoy ran his hands up and down the keyboard in a very amateur, albeit thoughtful way. For seven or eight minutes he randomly patted the keys, leaving spaces large and small between the cacaphonic clusters and coming to an end in the same way he began, with eyes closed and hands held motionless above his head, frozen after seeming to recoil from the instrument.
The audience was silent for a breath and then exploded in…applause? Finger snapping? Ohms and ahhs? I don’t recall.
Sri Chinmoy followed up by playing almost the exact same number on the flute, and then a few more times on maybe an organ and a sitar or something else. To be honest I thought he was pretty good. I taught Contemporary Improvisation at Carleton University for about a decade and I would have been happy to have had him in the group. He would have fit right in – university-level music students are a right bunch of weirdos, I can tell you that.
I remember the musical portion of the show being fairly short, maybe a half-hour or a little more, and can’t recall what happened next. There must have been some preaching involved, or at least some attempt to draw in new adherents. I’m pretty sure I stayed until the end and certainly don’t recall a collection plate or anything, so Sri must be getting corporate sponsorship. Or maybe he’s coasting on record royalties?
Regardless, I have to admit I find it a little disconcerting that I don’t recall the inevitable religion-pitch. These cult guys can be pretty sneaky and it pays to keep your wits about you in their presence. I must remember to ask the Supreme Leader about it at tomorrow’s meeting.
Todd Man Out 